Ok, I’m back. I’m not going to lie and say I’m back permanently/on a regular cadence because that didn’t work last time and I don’t want to disappoint the one reader I have (according to my WordPress analytics) who is probably myself.
The reason I’m back is because I’ve been doing some soul searching and trying to figure out what my passion is. What drives me? But – I like to write, I like to make people laugh, and I hate online dating because I suck at it so this is my attempt at a combination of all of those things I just listed as my strengths (which I realize is very depressing and pathetic, but at least I’m self-aware, so I’ll include that as a strength as well). I also realize these blog posts are a stream of my thoughts as they hit the key board, so sorry if they don’t make sense. But not really that sorry because if you don’t understand them then idk stop reading or something.
But anyway, I’ve been trying out new dating apps to get attention and validation meet a really nice boy. My most recent download is Hinge. I used to use Hinge about a year ago until I started getting really creepy messages from people who are probably pedophiles with daddy issues just misunderstood, so I deleted the app. However, desperate times call for desperate measures and I’m sick of people on Bumble not answering me, so here we are again! Who said being a millennial isn’t fun!
My favorite part of Hinge is the questions you can hand select and come up with creative answers for. For example, you can do two truths and a lie, list your pet peeves, list your strengths and weaknesses, and give other useless information important facts about your life that can spark up a conversation more easily than a group photo of 7 bros wearing Christmas-themed tuxedos can.
These fun little informative snacks about people’s personal lives are also an easy way to weed out the fucking weirdos almost immediately. I over analyze them as all raging psychopaths girls do, so I’m going to do exactly that below. I hope you enjoy/agree with my thoughts. If you do, congrats, you’re also a psycho. If you don’t, then we probably wouldn’t be friends.
I understand that having a great personality is a huge plus, but this guy isn’t even sure if his friends are joking or not
If this guy had left his response to the first sentence, he might have had a fighting chance. Actually, no I take that back. If the “only” good thing about you is your personality, then what the fuck else does that leave? Do you look like a troll? Are you a lazy POS? Are you a dumbass? What does that mean and why would that possibly make me like you if your only redeeming quality is your personality?
So – there’s a chance that this guy’s friends are joking about him having a good personality. If they are joking, he clearly doesn’t understand sarcasm, so we wouldn’t work out. If they aren’t joking then there’s two possible scenarios:
- He’s a deadbeat ogre with no personality
- His friends are assholes and he is “that friend” that’s an easy target
YAY!
Maybe his friends are funny. Assholes seem to be my type per past experience so either way, maybe I’ll message him and have him set me up with one of them.
I haven’t eaten or thought about a nerd rope since I scootered to a gas station in 7 th grade, so it took me a while to initially figure out what year we are currently living in after I read this.
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